Why I'm Not a Facebook Fan

My girlfriends religiously post on FB. Pictures, status updates, thoughts on politics, religion, restaurants, bands, movies…the list goes on.  And they post all times of the day and night.  I know at any given moment in time what Josie in Texas had for breakfast, what movie Trina in California saw last night, how Shawna in Colorado is about the jump over the cliff if school doesn’t start, like tomorrow.  While some may think this is a great and easy way to keep up with friends, I think of it as more of a way to avoid actual communication and talking, I mean really talking one-on-one, with those that we know. 

Facebook only paints the picture we want painted.  It may or may not be real but it is what we want others to think of us.  How many “friends” do you know that have what seems to be a near perfect life?  Their dear husband always does and says such cute things, their kids are adorable and such a delight to be around, even the most mundane snack – crackers and hot chocolate – can be turned into a gastronomical delight – in Facebook language.  It’s not real folks! 

For some reason it seems being braggadocios is the new norm.  In the old days we called this conceited.  As we get older we can call this narcissistic.  Meaning – it’s all about me!  Now, we know these last few years have been turbulent both socially and financially.  Social networking allows people to live the life they wished they were living.  Somehow make it look better than it really is.  While a little bit of living grand can be fun and actually mood boosting, too much of it creates a false sense of reality.  It becomes harder to live in the “real world” where life can actually be hard sometimes.  The husband is not always nice and the kids sometimes make bad grades and lose soccer games – because they really did play poorly.  Sometimes beans are just that – beans.  Not a filet mignon in disguise.  Just beans.

My solution to this?  Get the phone out and try calling a friend.  Talk to them out loud – where they can hear you.  Better yet, meet for coffee or go to the park or meet at each other’s house for an hour.  Simply reconnect with people and let them get to know the real you.  Get to know the real them.  You may be surprised at how much you like the “real” person and even more surprised to find out that they may actually like you, even the “real” you.

The musings of a Pseudo-intellectual

I was recently called a pseudo-intellectual.  A fake intellectual.  Someone of average intelligence who tries to keep up the facade of being intellectual.  Ouch.  Not a nice thing to say to someone.  And this was said to me because I love to read fiction.  Lightweight mystery novels that end well and leave me wanting more.  Books such as The Cat Who series, Hannah Swenson Mysteries, and Stephanie Plum novels just to name a few.  I suppose an intellectual would only read books about finance, money, politics, or religion?  No fun characters, no plots, no new exotic (and some not so exotic) locations, no new friends to be made through the joy of reading about people and places that really do not exist.  I guess the "intellectual" doesn't realize that all the above mentioned topics ARE covered in fiction!

Well, the comment stung for about 3.5 seconds.  I really don't care if I am thought of as "average" by someone who is really just insecure about their own intelligence and abilities.  Do people really believe they are better or smarter than someone simply because they don't, or can't read fiction?  I get so much joy from reading all kinds of books.  Fiction, nonfiction, poetry, religious, and even the occasional short article found in a favorite magazine.  Reading fiction takes me to places I've never been, introduces me to people I've never met but would love to, and opens my mind to worlds vastly different than my own.  I am on a constant adventure when I read.  And I do love adventures!

So, I've decided - I'm a pseudo-intellectual and PROUD of it!!!

Feels like a Saturday today.  It's not - just Wednesday.  DH took today off since he is not feeling well at all and the kids had a half day at school.  I blazed through work and finished what I needed to by 10:45am.  Then I thought to myself, "Yahoo, I have time for me now"!! The next thought was "What do I do?"  Laundry and cleaning house just do not sound appealing at all.  They do need to get done so I folded 2 loads of laundry and Good-Enough cleaned the downstairs bath.  Why does it seem like I have so many ideas and energy when I am overloaded with work?  I am much more productive when I'm too busy for my own good.  Ahh, now in addition to working in scheduling every day so I have time for every day it seems I need to learn to actually be productive  in my down time from work.

I think I just get thrown off the groove when the schedule is off - especially when DH is home.  I don't think I could ever work from home if he worked from home also - yea, it would be best if we didn't do that.  My favorite french writer did finally send out an update email yesterday!  I love to read Mirielle Guiliano - she of the French Women Don't Get Fat books.  What a delightful breath of fresh air she is!  I think it's time to pull out one of those books in anticipation of all things Spring and get ready for a truly beautiful new year!

Stressed. Again

It's only January 5 and I'm stressing for the year already.  My workload is just about laughable.  I have a boss that thinks I can work 15 hours a day - at least one would think so with the amount of work she has laid on my doorstep.  I know one of my resolutions is to try and schedule enough time in the day to do it all.  Well, let me tell you - I'm not very good at it yet.  Or maybe I'm just not good at not thinking about work all the time.  I can't figure out why I get so worried.  What is the worst case scenerio that could happen?  She could fire me.  But she needs me more than I need her at the moment so that is not likely to happen.  Ok - I miss a deadline or two in getting the work done - then she gets mad and chews me out.  But I've never missed a deadline because I always work, work, work to make sure I don't.   So, I do what I do every year - I just keep working and eventually it passes.  I just really wish I could find some other work that paid well, but that I really enjoyed doing.  Oh, and I need to stay at home to do it as I have all these kiddos to take care of too.

On a positive note - I did actually schedule 3 meals this week - scheduling is not really my strong suit, at least not in the meal department.  I am using my planner daily - at this point it's mostly to write down what I've already done but I'm confident that over time I may actually write something down that is to happen in the future!

Wishes or Resolutions?

Another new year....Again.  Every year this time comes and every year I am slightly unprepared for it.  I say slightly because I actually do put some thought into what I want to accomplish, but that's about as far as it gets.  I think a lot.  I'm a good thinker.  I would make a million bucks if one were to be paid for thinking.  Now, how to channel that thinking into action.

Father Anthony, in mass on Sunday, talked about wishing versus resolving.  I suppose I have been a wisher more than a resolver.  I would like to change that.  I actually already have I guess - last August I finally gave in  and "resolved" to lose weight.  Religiously I record every thing I eat on Loseit.com - everyday.  I have taken up exercising with my gal pal Denise Austin 3-4 times a week and I'm  happy to say I am down 15 lbs.  Whoo hoo!!!  But,  while I am starting to gain control over this area of my life, I feel the rest of it is still running wildly out of control.

The good news is that I have accomplished something new this year different from years before - it's January 4th and I have already bought my 2012 planner refill.  I usually ruminate on what is the best planner to buy for at least a month and then settle for the usual Franklin Planner and then rarely use it.  But it always looks good in my Pacific blue binder!!  I finally gave in today and bought the Mead version today at Walmart.  It really does have most of the bells and whistles of the FCP but at 1/3 of the price!!!  I took the savings and bought some nice moisturizer for mature skin.  (haha)

I wrote last year that I really want to get better at writing.  One more "wish" that I didn't turn into a resolution. Maybe this year will be different.  I get so caught up in work that I forget to have the joyful, inspiring, fun, fulfilling life that is waiting for me.  So, this year I am going to make some actual resolutions:

1.  Use my planner daily - it really works so much better for me than using my iPhone.  I'm just old I guess and really like to see pencil written on paper.

2.  Build my day around a schedule - only so many hours for work, fit in time for exercise - geez, 30 minutes is not too much to ask for is it?,  time to make dinner and actually fit in time to spend with my kids instead of just being in the same house with them.

3.  Follow my FlyLady routines.  I just love all things FlyLady - what a great concept to just take small steps to get my house looking spectacular - at any given moment of the day.  I have started again with shining the kitchen sink and swish and swiping the bathroom in the morning.  It feels so good!

4.  And lastly,  really really really try to write every day.  I need someway out of this correlation gig I have been doing for 5 years now.  The stress of the deadlines is really wearing on me - I don't do it because I love it but because it helps pay the bills.  I am truly grateful for that, but I will be stuck in this rut forever until I fill in the hole with something else.

There are so many more I could list, but then, like every other year they would lie fallow.  So, a few steps at a time and I will get there.
 Oh, I forgot - make time to pray more each day - this should be more ingrained in me by now so I hate to list it as a resolution - it's more like a habit that just needs dusting off.